Christmas swindling at my heart, maybe I’m having a good one because I didn’t have to pre-change my normal schedule or slumber and I can be up dawdling by 4pm after many wake ups and just drift in..unembarrassed as I swift over into medication and how it affects my life and schedule and suddenly I miss late nights. And I realize before everyday was a late night and barely any sleep. Something I want to meet in-between. It’s gotten the best of me, sleep. Almost like an overdose and this amount is seen as stability. I just moved faster? Toiled longer? Willing to put in the hours I sacrificed so much hours and styles. Being a polyphasic sleep just to meet the ends of days. I think in my soothing storytelling indie song: I didn’t want to admit and bolded myself by saying those things. Im exhausted still. “I can’t handle change nothing i do is ever good.,..” even in my music it rotates back to me.
I sacrificed, I can’t take back what I did with the hours I spent awake, and now it’s an uphill adjustment.
Insomnia, I learned to love you.
Now I need to back away.
I never thought I’d say that.
I love ambience,
And it had knack for me.
petrichor - archive 